Transracial adoption is a beautiful yet complex journey that brings together families from different racial backgrounds. According to the 2010 U.S. Census, an estimated 2 million children were identified as adopted, with approximately one-fourth being transracial adoptions. While the experience of adopting a child from another race or culture can be enriching, it also presents unique challenges that families must navigate. In this blog post, we’ll explore the concept of the transracial adoption paradox, the impact it has on children and families, and how therapy can provide essential support.
Dr. Kashmanian meeting her son in China when she adopted him at six years old.
What is the Transracial Adoption Paradox?
Imagine growing up in a loving home where you’re surrounded by the customs, traditions, and privileges of your adoptive family’s culture. Yet, when you step outside, the world sees you as part of a racial minority. This disconnect is at the heart of the transracial adoption paradox—a phenomenon where children raised in a different racial or cultural environment than their birth identity struggle with belonging fully to either their adoptive culture or their birth culture.
For many transracial adoptees, this paradox can lead to stress, anxiety, and a profound sense of not fitting in. Children may grapple with the privileges associated with their adoptive family’s racial identity while being unprepared for the world’s perception of them based on their physical appearance.
The Role of Identity and Cultural Socialization
A child’s identity is multifaceted, encompassing relationships, beliefs, and the cultural narratives with which they grow up. For transracial adoptees, identity formation can be especially complex. As they become aware of their racial differences and adoption status—often as early as 4 to 5 years old—they may experience feelings of loss and begin to confront discrimination and racism in their daily lives.
Cultural socialization plays a crucial role in helping transracial adoptees develop a healthy sense of identity. This involves the way parents address racial and ethnic identity within the family, teaching customs, values, and beliefs from the child’s birth culture. Parents who actively engage in cultural socialization can help their children develop a positive ethnic identity, which serves as a protective factor against the negative impacts of discrimination.
However, this isn’t always an easy task. Adoptive parents must make intentional decisions about how to integrate their child’s birth culture into their family life. This requires them to reflect on their own attitudes toward race and take steps to embrace and celebrate their child’s cultural heritage. They may need to make efforts to celebrate different holidays, learn to cook new foods, learn a different language, and more.
The Impact on Children and Families
Research shows that transracial adoptees often struggle more with racial and ethnic issues compared to same-race adoptees. The awareness of being different, combined with the experience of discrimination, can lead to greater psychological distress and lowered self-esteem. It’s not uncommon for these children to feel caught between two worlds—belonging to neither fully.
For adoptive families, the journey can also be challenging. Parents may struggle with how to address their child’s ethnic and racial differences or feel uncertain about how to incorporate their child’s birth culture into everyday life. These challenges underscore the importance of culturally competent parenting—where parents are equipped with the knowledge and resources to support their child’s ethnic identity.
Dr. Kashmanian sharing her son’s first Halloween.
Therapeutic Approaches for Transracial Families
Therapy can be an invaluable resource for transracial families, providing a safe space to explore identity issues and develop strategies for cultural socialization. Family therapy models that incorporate cultural competence are particularly effective in supporting transracial adoptees.
Key considerations for therapy include:
- Cultural Socialization: Therapists can guide parents in engaging with their child’s birth culture in meaningful ways, helping the child build a positive ethnic identity (Lee et al., 2006).
- Culturally Competent Parenting: Parents may need help in expanding their cultural belief systems to fully support their child’s development (Bailey, 2007).
- Adaptive Approaches: Therapy should be tailored to the individual needs of the child and family, with sensitivity to the child’s readiness to explore their birth culture (Benoit et al, 2018).
Continuing the Journey
The journey of transracial adoption is ongoing, filled with both joys and challenges. By fostering open communication, cultural awareness, and strong family bonds, transracial adoptees and their families can navigate the complexities of identity with resilience and grace.
For those interested in delving deeper into this topic, we recommend the podcast “Adoptees On” which explores the experiences of adoptees, including those who have navigated transracial adoption. This podcast provides valuable insights and personal stories that can further enrich your understanding of the transracial adoption experience.
Transracial adoption is a unique and transformative experience for both children and parents. By acknowledging and addressing the challenges that come with it, families can ensure that all members thrive.
References
Bailey, J. D. (2007). A Practice Model to Protect the Ethnic Identity of International Adoptees. Journal of Family Social Work, 10(3), 1–11. https://doi.org/10.1300/J039v10n03_01
Benoit L, Harf A, Sarmiento L, Skandrani S, Moro MR. Shifting views and building bonds: Narratives of internationally adopted children about their dual culture. Transcultural Psychiatry. 2018;55(3):405-427. doi:10.1177/1363461518764250
Lee, R. M., Grotevant, H. D., Hellerstedt, W. L., & Gunnar, M. R. (2006). Cultural Socialization in Families With Internationally Adopted Children. Journal of Family Psychology, 20(4), 571–580. https://doi.org/10.1037/0893-3200.20.4.571
